Some people might see this blog as a bitch session. It isn't. In all fairness to me, I am a pretty positive and happy person. I usually see the best in people to a fault and I have a huge heart. This is all true when my hormone levels are operating as they should. Then came that bitch, menopause, and ruined everything. Tramp.
Everything you think you know about menopause is probably not a lot. Hot flashes? Weight gain? Absolutely, and that is only the beginning of the effects of being in menopause. Thanks to TikTok, social media, and lots of strong women, we now know that menopause affects so much more of our overall health.
I've decided to blog regularly about my journey with menopause and her late friend, perimenopause. My hope is that by sharing my story on the platforms that I have, I can help educate. Maybe you'll read something that makes you realize you're not alone or crazy. Hopefully you can have more compassion for other women going down this road, including yourself. Be kind.
I think I've been in menopause for about 3+ years at this point. Without a uterus I really don't know. In September of 2021, I had a partial hysterectomy, leaving behind only my ovaries (no tubes, just the ovaries for hormones). Hence why I'm pretty sure I'm in menopause, plus the fact that my doctor tested hormone levels that agreed with my Dr. Google search results. Welcome to the menopause era tour. Who's afraid of little old me?
At the moment, I'm on my second doctor, second brand of hormone pellets, and I've added in a functional nutritionist to the hormone mix. After meeting with her about my weight gain, Ozempic and my sleepless nights, she was convinced that I needed progesterone. At least I think she is right about needing progesterone even though I don't have a uterus. In all honesty, it's a hodgepodge of people with their fingers in my hormonal health. Example: the doctor who performed my hysterectomy asked me at every appointment if I still had my ovaries. Every single appointment which is why I'm now on Doctor #2 and needed the help of a fuctional nutritionist.
I've tried creams, troches, pills, and I still felt like hormonal crap. Let me clarify that: I felt like overall crap. I'd fall asleep on the couch within minutes of walking in the door from work; I was bone weary tired. I also wasn't sleeping well at night, and my weight kept creeping up. Plus, I was angry, highly irritable, hit or miss sex drive and exhausted. Like tired enough to mention it twice.
When I finally had it and was appropriately desperate I decided to get hormone pellets. That first couple of rounds with THAT doctor is another story. Right now, I'm down the road a couple years, different doctor and as of today I'm pissed off. Really irritated at me. I asked to have my pellet dose increased in both estrogen and testosterone and ... it was too strong. My face is breaking out in chin hairs and I'm more irritated with life than is honestly justified. Plus, I just ordered a $300 IPL for facial hair that may or may not work.
Obviously I'm more irritable than I realized, because my husband told to call the doctor and see if the pellets can be removed.
Me: "Hi- it's been a week and my pellets are too strong. I'm really irritable and want to hurt someone. Can they be taken out?"
Dr. Asst.: "Unfortunately, no. We'll call in a prescription for an estrogen patch. Change it every 3 days for a month and that should counteract the side effects of too much testosterone."
Me: "So more hormones will make my high hormone levels feel better?"
Dr. Asst: "Yep."
This was about 2 months ago and I'm finally feeling ... better? Not really. I think I had a good month of feeling balanced and now I'm starting to feel crappy again. Over the past week I've slept worse, my chin hairs are coming in fast and furious and my body just hurts. All signs when my HRT pellets are coming near their end. Out of the last 2 1/2 months I've had my testosterone and estrogen pellets in my butt (in the fatty upper portion) I think I've felt good for 4 weeks. At the moment this doesn't feel like a fair trade. $400 in pellets, $100 in estrogen patches and only a month of feeling good.
On my to do list tomororw is to find a new doctor. My accupuncturist nailed it (pun again) when he said I need one doctor to manage it all. I really thought that 3 plus years after my hysterectomy that I'd be feeling more like myself. I am, but it's the new and improved menopausal me. The super positive and funny one who never gets irritated and shaves her face with a razor that cuts her. xxoo
Above is my injury with a women's face shaving straight razor. Tried to get rid of my facial hair by giving myself a dermaplane.
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